TL;DR

I realized I was mad at Jesus.

So I forgave Jesus. And Jesus thanked me.

And while I was at it, I thanked God, too.

She thanked me as well.

And She told me to invite Her and Jesus and my friends to help me write this post.

So I did.

What annoyed me

As you know, I've been doing “A Course In Miracles.” Well, maybe you don’t know. Perhaps you didn’t read this or this. Never mind. I’m doing the Course.

The course came from Helen Schucman, credited as its "scribe," not its author. She produced the Course through a process of inner dictation. An inner voice gave her the words, and she wrote them down in shorthand. Her colleague, Bill Thetford, co-scribe, transcribed.

So who is the author?

The text of the Course says things like this:

and

But the Course never identifies who "I" or “me” refers to.

Some people who teach the Course say the “I” is “The Holy Spirit." But the Course materials refer to The Holy Spirit in the third person. So maybe you buy that. And maybe not.

Some people who teach the course say that the Course came from Jesus. Apparently Helen and Bill said so. That might be so, but it annoyed me whenever I heard it.

Why? I have no trouble quoting scripture (love to.)

The Course is full of God-talk, and I’ve not had trouble with that. And the God I don’t believe in drops into my blog from time to time, and I have no problem with Her.

So why did I get annoyed about the teachers crediting Jesus?

How I resolved it

I realized that I wasn’t pissed off at the teachers. I was pissed at Jesus.

I like Jesus. I have for a long time. I would not call myself Christian, but I do try to follow most of Jesus’ teachings. And yes, I want to save the world.

I recognize Jesus as a Son of God, the same as I recognize myself and you and everyone else as sons. If you take Jesus at his word, we are all children of God. He teaches us to say "Our Father," not "His Father” or “Jesus’ Father.”

Finally, I realized why I was so pissed.

I thought Jesus had done a decent job of conveying God's Word. He'd worked hard, even let himself be crucified to try to teach us a lesson. (But, sadly, most people got the lesson wrong.)

But in the end, Jesus fucked up the messaging. Here’s the proof: the fact that the Spanish Inquisition, the Crusades, and the fucking Religious Right had done what they had done and had been doing what they were doing in Jesus’ name meant that the Message was just not clear enough.

It’s clear enough to me. “Love your enemies” seems unambiguous. It’s inconsistent with torture, war, revilement, and hate. But that’s just me. Apparently, the message was not clear to everyone.

If Jesus had done a better job, I thought, the Message could not have been so badly misunderstood. And it was badly misunderstood.

No matter.

Jesus did the best he could. So I forgave him.

"I apologize," I said to Jesus. “I was judging you, and that was a mistake. And I forgive you..”

"And thereby you were judging yourself," Jesus answered. “Also a mistake. And by forgiving me, you are also forgiven.”

Jesus was right. I was judging myself. "Yes," I said. "I was.” And after a moment, I continued: “And I probably would have fucked up worse."

"Thank you," Jesus said. He knew there was no arrogance or pride in my forgiving him. He knew I was not placing myself above him. He knew it would have been arrogant for me to withhold forgiveness as soon as I recognized resentment. I mean, if I can forgive fucking Donald J. Trump, how could I not forgive my brother, Jesus.

Jesus continued. "Realize, of course, that what you call reality is but one of God's many Plans. According to this particular Plan, I screw up the messaging. They misunderstand it. You see the error. You forgive me. I accept. You write this. And you, dear reader, you, read this and are also forgiven—all according to this Plan.

“Thank you,” said a reader.

“WTF?” asked another.

"Each of us must forgive to be forgiven," Jesus said, "We are beyond time, so which comes first does not matter. Some will forgive and then be forgiven. Others will be forgiven and later forgive. But, eventually, all will forgive, and all will be forgiven.

“You have forgiven,” Jesus said to me, and everyone else who had forgiven.

“So you are forgiven,” he said.

“And you will have forgiven,” Jesus said to those who had not yet forgiven but will, according to the Plan.

I felt lighter. I was forgiven. For that, at least.

"In time, for everything," Jesus said.

"Thank you," I said, "And thank you, God. You have created everything good and beautiful in this world, and I love you for that. But being infinite, You have also created everything ugly and bad, all misery and pain and suffering. And I forgive You for that."

"Thank you," God said. "You’re not quite right about how these things came about, but that’s an advanced lesson for later. So, for now, let’s say you are directionally correct, and forgiving Me moves you on your way.

“In the end, these bad things do not matter because in each of My Plans, Love triumphs. And you must see that..."

"Yes," I said, "I think I see. Nothing evil in this world could exist without my agreement. So I must forgive myself as well as You."

"Also, directionally correct," God said. "Now take this, inspired by your connection with your brother, Noel, and turn it into a blog post.

“Each time you edit it,” God said, “I will help you correct some of your errors. Of course, what you publish will not be perfect because nothing is perfect but You, Me, Jesus, Noel, Billy, and the rest of your brothers.

“But it will be pretty good."

"Rember," Jesus said, "whenever two or more of you are gathered in My Name, I am there.”

"Me, too," God said. "Write your post with Us and your friends in mind. That's all the invitation that We need,

"Be assured; We will be there."

You might want to subscribe. Or you might not. Either way, you are forgiven.