Holding hands with the unconscious

I’m close to making a change in my life. Everything’s ready. It’s been ready for a while. But I don’t make the change. This happens a lot.

Why?

Specifically this:

Here’s the change I want to make:

When I discover something interesting, or I have a thought I’d like to preserve, I want to write about it. I want to turn it into a post in this blog or another one. I want to write in multiple blogs—one for each kind of content. I want to be a prolific poster.

That shouldn’t be hard. I know how to write a post for this blog. Why not use the same process for others?

To state the goal more clearly:

When I find a random interesting thing, I want to publish a post it in my blog, “Random S*&# I Learned Today.” When I think of an important life lesson, I want to write it up and post it in my blog “What Passes for Wisdom.” If it’s intended for my grandkids, I want to post it in “For the borglings.” I want discoveries of cool stuff on the Internet to go in Joy of Internet. And so on. I’ve got other blogs for other things.

This should be easy. Just keep doing what I’ve been doing (writing here) and add one or more blogs.

But haven’t been doing it.

Worse, I’ve slowed my posting in this blog.

Why?

I think I understand why.

The conscious and the unconscious

To develop a new habit—whether writing in multiple blogs or writing more regularly in this one—I need two things: first, a conscious decision to do it; second, unconscious compliance with the decision.

Two things: a decision by the conscious mind, compliance, and execution by the unconscious.

Why?

Because most of what I do I do unconsciously. Like writing. I’ve decided to write something along the lines of the paragraph you are reading. Unconscious processes have taken over. The words appear. I consciously review the result. If I decide it’s what I want (and I do), then we’re done. If I decide it’s not what I want, it goes back to the unconscious for revision. Rarely I have to analyze it consciously, and determine what’s wrong, or make a more unambiguous conscious decision about what I want. But the work gets done by the unconscious. That’s how this paragraph came into existence. That’s how everything I do happens.

If I decide to do something that I am already “unconsciously competent” at doing, I have to be careful. My unconscious processes might start, but if they hit a roadblock, they’re likely to veer off and do something else.

If I decide to do something that’s a real change, something else happens.

Resisting change

My unconscious mind resists change. Thanks to Jordan Peterson’s “Maps of Meaning” I think I know why.

Creatures—including human—innately fear the unknown. In the right context, that my unconscious might mix fear with anticipation of a reward, but fear is always there.

Changing from writing one blog to writing many produces fear.

What’s there to fear? What could possibly happen that would worry me?

Nothing. But it’s not “me” that’s worried. It’s my unconscious—the part of me that has to do the work.

What could happen? Anything. Anything at all. Without assurances that constrain the unconscious imagination, anything at all can happen.

A path to success

Realizing this, I see a way to victory.

I need to assure my unconscious that making the change is safe. I need to listen to its concerns and reassure it that everything will be fine. Not only that, but things will go well.

When I write my first post for another blog, I can’t just “decide to write” and expect my unconscious to comply. I need to “hold its hand.”: I need to expect that feelings of discomfort may arise and when they do, I need to hold hands with my fearful unconscious, and help it do its job.

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